As I was walking past the grand wall of sacrifices at one of my favorite places, I noticed something scribbled at the bottom of one of the sacrifice options. "MUST WORSHIP SATIN," it read. This, clearly, was no typo! And I've been pondering this... Why satin? Why not cotton? or silk? or velvet? or yarn? flax? spandex? burlap?
of course, it was a typo. of course, they meant satan.
Please, if you have any information that will help me crack this mystery, let me know!
And, just to clue you in, I crossed it out so none of you would lose sleep over this puzzlement.


Have a QUACKTASTIC day!

Does anyone else find it extremely hilarious that these are unisex?

PROM ALT. IN TWO DAYS! SEE YOU ALL THERE (and I probably will)!
I love you. I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU!!!

weird conversation

Yesterday for Easter, Jackie, Ryan, and I went to Ryan's house in Littlefork. Ryan's brother Justin was there. He wasn't hanging out with us, just sitting in the living room playing his guitar. We were all in the garage and we wanted him to hang with us. I forgot what Ryan was doing, but Jac and I went in the house to get Justin to hang out with us. As we walked in, we heard him in the next room playing guitar. This is how the little conversation went.

Jac: Wait.. Listen..
Me: Yeah, it sounds like something dad plays. No, I don't know. It sounds strangely familiar.
Jac: I.. I think it's Simon & Garfunkel.
[walks into living room and sits in chair by Justin]
Jac: I love Simon & Garfunkel.
Justin: Oh, do you?
Jac: Yeah.
Justin: Well, that was The Beatles.


I guess you had to have been there, but it was funny at the time. I hope you all had a good Easter break. I love every single one of you! You're all very much appreciated. :)

an early greeting

Good morning! I know I probably won't get a chance to post these things on their actual event time, so I figured I would post them now. Why? Because I love you! Soooooooooooo....

on saturday...
HAPPY 13th BIRTHDAY, SYDNEY!!!

and on sunday..
HAPPY EASTER, EVERYONE!!!
HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY, MIKE!!!


The caption underneath the picture is supposed to say "what happens when hens eat fruit loops."

And, in case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening, and good night.

a belated greeting

Because I had no chance until now to post this, I am writing a belated birthday greeting to the best youth pastor EVER.

To celebrate, I will sing--type--the lyrics to the song we wrote for you a few years back. Lyrics can be sung to the tune of Gangstaz Paradise (Coolio) or Amish Paradise (Weird Al). We suggest the latter.

As I walk through the Assembly where I pastor the youth
I ponder the prospects of the things I'd like to do
A perfect idea for a summer retreat
Where I will invite all the sixth graders I'll meet

At 5:30 on a Wednesday I'm moving chairs
I'm shooting up some pool
And I'm saying prayers, dude
Cuz I'm pretty sure that before too long
They'll be flooding through the doors
But, soon, they'll be gone

I might make up some new words
But did you hear what I said?
I got a Bible in my hand and no hair on my head
But if I finish my devotions, and you finish yours
Then I promise that next week
You'll get a bling-bling reward

Been working with my wife in this Hibbing AG paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice in this Hibbing AG paradise
BOOYA!

I love you, dude!

el jugar de tarjetas

I've always enjoyed playing cards. There are thousands of different games out there: poker, texas hold'em, egyptian war, spoons, straws, or knives (or whatever is handy at the time), or speed (one of my personal favorites). Here is a brief history.

The earliest of playing cards are said to have originated in Central Asia in the 10th century. The Chinese used paper dominoes and they shuffled and dealt them at the beginning of each game, as we do. The four suited decks we use today were invented by the French, and only very wealthy people could afford them because they were hand-painted. With the invention of woodcuts in the 14th century, the French began mass production. The suits--spades, clubs, hearts, diamonds--were the easiest of shapes and used flat colors, therefore they helped facilitate manufacture.

Did you know that the kings and queens in each deck represents a high king or queen in history? Here are the kings...

• King of Hearts - Charlemagne
• King of Clubs - Alexander the Great
• King of Diamonds - Julius Caesar
• King of Spades - King David

and the queens...

• Queen of Hearts - Judith (biblical figure)
• Queen of Clubs - Regina (err, unknown)
• Queen of Diamonds - Rachel (biblical figure)
• Queen of Spades - Pallas Athena (Greek goddess)

You all make me sad. I can levitate birds, and no one cares. :(